Welcome to Would I Workout There (WIWT) – a column where I, a professed fitness freak – take a look at the virtual gyms in video games and answer that pressing question: would I, in fact, break a sweat and do a little work in this space. You can read all the installments here.
I personally bounced off of Final Fantasy 7 Remake. I only barely touched the original game, and I’m just not the biggest fan of the overall character designs in the game, so I fell off after about a dozen hours. However, if I had spent more time in this funky Wall Market MMA/lifting gym, I may have stayed a bit longer. Perhaps just a bit, but after my colleague Imran shared some footage with me, I felt a slight flutter in my heart. Of all the areas and features of this game… this is my place.
It’s not the cleanest gym (the bathroom is especially uninspiring, but it’s probably cleaner than the real-life facilities at my first boxing gym in San Francisco…), and the equipment is somewhat limited, but there’s a real vibe here.
The facility is open and airy, with a full boxing ring (where the… bodyweight squat competition, lol, takes place), a bunch of weight racks and benches, pull-up bars, and heavy bags for MMA/boxing/kickboxing workouts.
There’s plenty of space — and even a few tables, where people have… flagons? That better be sports drink in there, y’all. If you lift and drink (or worse, practice MMA and drink), you are absolutely going to hurt yourself. That’s just my medical opinion, but it’s correct.
One thing that absolutely escalates this place is the level of the fitness fashion. THESE LOOKS. I would wear any of these outfits to work out. I would also, very likely, rock my own Fanbyte rashguard to show off my own place while crushing a set of pull-ups.
Now, I must ask the crucial question, the one I ask every time in this fledgling column. Would I Work Out There? Yes, absolutely. I will admit, thanks to a badly damaged wrist, there are several pieces of equipment I cannot interact with here (I had to switch to grappling from boxing because of this), but I would be very happy to work on my kicks with the heavy bag, crush the hell out of any of these fools in a bodyweight squat contest, and probably train some wrestling or Jiu Jitsu in the ring, provided I was allowed to bleach it down before jumping in there.
There are plenty of cleaning supplies in the corner of the room, and anytime my face might be crushed into the canvas (a natural part of grappling, it’s weird! Don’t judge me!), that material better smell more like cleaning supplies than stinky feet. I’m a woman with standards, ok?
But yes, I’d absolutely work out here, probably grab a selfie with some of the more fashionable bros hanging out, and walk out feeling like a million bucks.
